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Wet Lettuce Preview: How to Make Friends with the Right People

When I say ‘right’ I mean people who match you. People who share your interests and hobbies. It will be difficult for a complete dog racing nut to find something to talk about with a Fundamentalist...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: How to Become a Triathlete

I’m starting to realise as I write that a good many of the things I can tell you how to do, start with a measure of madness. Perhaps I should reconsider my definition of what’s normal. My standards...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: How to Get Married

“People don’t need advice on how to get married,” I hear you say. “Besides, you’re not a wedding planner, and you’re not Larry King. You have little experience of weddings, so what are you doing...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: How to Freak Out Your Kids

For most people, the biggest freak-out day in their life is when the simple fact of their existence stands like a warty naked guy blocking the only avenue of escape from the conclusion that at some...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: Motivate Me

At the time of writing, I am an exercise nut. I go to gym every morning for two hours or so Monday to Thursday, take Fridays off, run on Saturday mornings, then go for a long cycle of 100km+ on...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: How to Enjoy Your Children

In Ireland, these days, if you want to work with children in any way, you have to go through child safety training and Garda (police) vetting. The forms for the Garda clearance application are...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: How to Lose Your Religion

I have, thank Go- er… goodness, not experimented with a vast number of religions. Like the majority of human beings, I was born into a culture which subscribed to a specific one. In my case, it was...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: My Arse’s Lid

My oldest son coined the term: “My mom gets responsible road rage. She mutters and swears at other cars, but she still drives responsibly.” This special brand of road rage can be triggered by any...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: The Wedding

Micky and I are such antisocial recluses that we lived in Ireland more than five years before getting to know someone well enough to be invited to a wedding. Now, in spite of my feelings about the...

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Wet Lettuce Preview: How to Get Over a Mountain

…with a too-heavy bicycle, a tent, and two stuffed panniers. Okay, I confess: I used to smoke. It was a horrible habit I picked up in my teens, dropped for the better part of eleven years, took up...

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